Once upon a time in Izmir
This is the story of our heroine, Heroina, who discovers the power of truly wanting something and believing in it. By all means, you are free to interpret this as a story of desire and faith but from a larger perspective, this is a quantum mechanics story.
Heroina is an emotional realist who sees life through multiple lenses. Her capacity for empathy and her inclination towards drama in life has complicated the better part of her life, so far, while leading her to prove her strength to herself. Like all heroes, she has left her comfort zone and excelled in life, then returned home and reevaluated her situation.
One must know that truth is a subjective concept dependent on the perspective one's looking through. So, when returned home, Heroina had the opportunity to take a look at her life from different perspectives. Watching her life unfold before her eyes while wide awake, Heroina felt a series of uncomfortable emotions. Hindsight is a funny thing. Things appear so clearly yet remembering the actual moments and emotions that have been lived through and felt is awfully hard. For all the so-called 'wrong' choices she has made, she has chosen to be kind, kind to herself. A step further down the road, right past self-justification, she has found a new place, where she called the 'guilt-freedom', in which societies' expectations momentarily didn't define her truth. Listening to her own voice, she turned this place into her land of the free-spirited soul and balanced vibrations.
Finding tranquility in the chaos of her creation was the epitome of her power, anyway. Being able to manipulate her perception as well as the people around her was something like an occupational hazard for her, having been raised in a particularly challenging family at a time of change. Coming to terms with her failures and seeing the necessity in these failures to learn, grow, and succeed was traumatic at first. After all, all origin stories need a traumatic yet transformational experience for the hero to emerge anew.
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Even though this is the story of Heroina discovering will power and having faith in herself and her beliefs to construct her own truth, she had to climb up the ladder step by step and discover a few more things before arriving at this conclusion.
Her ancestral characteristics exude a distinct array of colors that would leave anyone in awe. The self-reliance, can-do attitude, passion, and hunger for learning defined her very personality. Yet, she always valued her support-circle as the most important thing in her life which made life worth living. She feared failure so much so that at times she couldn't succeed because of her infatuation with the fear. Her passion for life quite dramatically plummeted in her early 20s but the one constant in her life remained as the never-ending desire to learn and enrich her perspective. Even at her worst hour, she still managed to feed the fire just enough to keep it burning. This, truly, showed her strength and resilience.
In the midst of this chaos, which Heroina called her life, she had a North Star so-to-speak. Polaris was Yoko Ono to Heroina's John Lennon or Simone de Beauvoir to her Jean-Paul Sartre... Their relationship was based on critical thinking and contemplation. Together and apart, they had a dynamic of talking and thinking over select concepts, dissecting choices, consequences, and circumstances in an effort to grasp the underlying forces that shape human behavior and perception. What a relationship, indeed!
Oftentimes, Polaris and Heroina didn't see things eye to eye yet enriched each others' perspectives just the same. Agreeing to disagree but continuing to discuss matters and evolving each other's points of view and attitudes towards life was what kept them together throughout all these years. Some things never change and their passion for listening to each other's unique points of view and endless acceptance of each others' faults were the constants in their relationship.
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Being the North Star, Polaris most often than not had the moral high ground. Since this is a transformational journey, Polaris had her fair share of the spiritual awakening of her own.
Polaris is a discrete person. Not only her trade but also her personality strives for discretion. So, she kept her trauma to herself at a moment of truth, and in hindsight, Heroina saw this as the start of a chain reaction which will turn her life upside down.
Equally excelled in empathy, Polaris lived vicariously through Heroina's journey while living her own up-side-down version in a loop. When all the cards were put down on the table, the two resilient women saw in each other the same little girl who made difficult choices and lived with enduring consequences.
These two kindred souls diverged from one another in one paramount way; while Polaris obsessed about choices and consequences, Heroina always had a thing for circumstances. Nevertheless, both powerful women had a firm belief in being the master of their own faith.
Que in W. Ernest Henley's Invictus:
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.
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